Opinion

Answering the Facebook question “What’s on your mind?” – By Lorenz Bajah

There is a politician in very many people on Facebook, like Nigerian politicians who visit their voters once in four years, this is the same way people of Zuckerville too act.

Some Zuckervillians can hibernate for long and appear some few days to their birthdays and start sending hi and hello to people, wishing for birthday wishes in return. In this fifth year of the reign of GMB I always answer such greetings with a block fas fas.

Some other ones will be friends with you for years without liking or commenting on your stuff, then from nowhere, you get a message from them, that I’m contesting for this, please vote for me. In this year 2020 that Federal Government is using tax payers money in the budget to fund livestock of herdsmen but is acting as if IDPs victims of herdsmen don’t exist, I simply block such people.

I can not be voting politicians once in four years to share national moimoi and come and be voting their siblings here on Zuckerville who seek to use me once in a long while. Dem do me for village? Make people de always use me?

There are some who invite you to like their pages or stuff from nowhere. Others campaign for friends and family in one competition or the other, they tag or go inbox. In this year that we don’t know who is more powerful between voters, INEC and Supreme Court. I simply block them.

Some Zuckervillians will leave the subject matter in your post and attack you personally. In this year that human life is the cheapest commodity in the country since 1914. This same year that extreme poverty and depression have erected their global headquarters in Nigeria. I block quickly. This year I don’t want chest pain.

If I snap photo in one fine place and from nowhere you get into my messenger and you are like “bro you travel?” after knowing me on and offline and not having business with me for years, I block such people immediately. so if life push me back to my Riverside village of Abuku, you no go send me abi? Yeye. I want to be very petty this year, yes, na my petty.

Thanks for coming out for this Zuckerville hall meeting at a very short notice. You can now return back to your tents.

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